Counting the day....

[dawn.believes]

Does everyone count how many days they have been abstinent? I just wonder because it seems to stress me out counting the days so I think I will stop. I know that yesterday would have been day 5 but I made some bad decisions and at things I should not have....alot of things I should not have. So, I am all like, back to day 1 which seems depressing so that is why I don't think I am going to count the days anymore. I mean, I will do the best I can each day one day at a time. I just don't feel like I am doing it one day at a time when I am keeping count of how many days I have been going at it. You know? Does this make sense to anyone else? I just see everyone talking about how days they have gone and that just seems like it will really set me up to get very upset if I do have a relapse or eat something I shouldn't. I want to be able to think, "Well, that was something I should not have eaten and I know this so I am going to move on and eat like I should." For some reason, counting the days keeps me from being able to honestly say that to myself. Opinion and thoughts on this please....

Be blessed,
Dawn

[JustForToday]

Dawn,

I understand what you are sharing and I began my abstinence before the date I chose as the beginning of my abstinence. Once I became abstinent, I stopped looking at the number of days and I knew that it was close to the beginning of the month, so I knew that whatever date I chose would be ok, when people began asking and I began giving service. So I chose my late sister's birthday to honor her memory. Once I became abstinent, the number of days seems less and less important - the only day that really counts now is what I've done today to help myself to stay abstinent and stay in recovery.

Keep coming back, this way of life really does work.

[faa4me]

Yes, Dawn... counting days can be like a sort of prison. In addition, it's often a sign of someone who's using their willpower to stay abstinent, because you'll often see someone get to a certain point (say, 30 days or 90 days) and they are unable to keep it going any longer.

On the other hand, some newcomers do like to count days because it gives them a feeling of happiness to see the days piling up. I personally was not one of these people. I knew the date, and I honored it each month by announcing my monthly anniversary each month when the time came in a phone meeting for people to announce if they were celebrating an anniversary. Then I'd say something, not only for myself, but in a large way to show others that the program can and does work.

Since it's a trigger for you, Dawn, what probably will work is to make note of your abstinence date on your calendar, and then forget about it for now. Work on surrendering to the fact of your food addiction and surrendering to the food plan (if you're on the suggested FAA food plan)... A way you can "work" on these is to ask a Power greater than yourself each day to help you stay abstinent and free of volume or gray foods. Asking this Power is saying to yourself that you can't do this by yourself, and that you do need the help. At night, thank the Power for your day of abstinence. The next day, do the same. Stay in the day, and don't worry about "forever"... that's a very long time to have to stay abstinent on our own willpower! But for this one day, and with the Higher Power's help, we CAN do this!

[dawn.believes]

Thanks so much guys! I do feel much better and that is exactly what I will do. I am going to put my date on the calendar and then I will just forget about the date for now. One day at a time....not thinking about yesterday or tomorrow. Be blessed, Dawn

[faa4me]

That's great, Dawn. Wishing you the very best in your recovery!

[nevertoolate]

:chuncky:KEEP COMING BACK, DAWN, FAA IS HERE FOR YOU!
Marilyn

[dawn.believes]

I am still rockin' it! And I have no idea what day I am on....LOL! though I did write it on the calendar. I feel great! The withdrawel is MUCH better! Don't want to ever go through that again. Ugh! Be blessed, Dawn

[shines_so_bright]

Congratulations, Dawn! One day at a time, sometimes even one meal at a time if necessary, abstinence can be achieved and maintained. It's very, very worth it. I'm very happy for you... keep up the good work!