I'm seeing pastries all day long!

[Darian]

Hi there,
I'm new here and this is my first post. I read 'Food Addiction: The Body Knows', 'Addictive Personality' by Craig Naikken and have been trying to do the food plan for 2 months now, only first 2 weeks successfully. The reason I relapsed after two weeks is that I started working at a cafe/restaurant that my father owns which also makes and sell great pastries, cookies and cakes, the food is great too. First it was the long hours and, stress and being tired that messed up my doing the plan now that the hours are better and the stress is almost gone, it's the great pastries that I find difficult to stay away from, they are right in front of me all day long, smelling delicious, looking delicious, just tempting me. Not working here is not an option, because I love the job, it pays good and the alternative is staying home and watching tv all day, which is another addiction of mine. Also there are not many job opportunities in my area as well as no FAA meetings. I really need support and advice on how to control my cravings and not turning to eating at every stressful moment, or out of boredom, or when I feel tired, because it's right there, at my fingertips, it's so easy. I really appreciate any comments and hope to be better and rid of this addiction.

[here42da]

Hi,
Glad you are here and that you decided to share. Unfortunately I lost my post after writing it, so will try again. I have a few tips that have been shared with me. Since you were successful for a couple of weeks you do know that it can be done. Don't give up. If you want this - it is doable. And we all have various forms of history concerning the success of following the food plan. It is important to have support either from a sponsor or others in program. Reaching out is key. You can find information as far as meetings by using this link.

http://www.foodaddictsanonymous.org/meetings

A couple of acronyms that I find helpful are: "HALT" which stands for hungry, angry, lonely, tired. Also "BLT" stands for bite, lick, taste. You might find journaling helpful in looking at these words and thinking about when you are experiencing these feelings. Also if I start with the second one I am quickly sliding down into a relapse. Some people get a glass of water to stave off the desire to eat when not appropriate. Or count to 100 first, or visualize the skull and crossbones, meaning poison on an offending food. Breathe in, breathe out, or visualize something wonderful, or even think about how much better you will feel and look when following the food plan.
We have some great FAA approved literature which can be bought, that helps us in our journey.

http://www.foodaddictsanonymous.org/catalog/4

[alicemdavid]

Welcome Darian,

We welcome you for Food Addicts Anonymous, I have learned to tell my self when tempted by foods not on the food plan to say this is not my food. I have had more than my share of those things. I also do this just for today thats it ...one day @ a time, that is manageable for me one day is all this food addict can handle.

I use prayer daily some times 3 to 4 times a day it truly helps me stay abstinent, I never had good orderly direction till I came to FAA. I found a wonderful tool here the guide to abstinence and also the power of we because I truly can not do this alone. It was a struggle for me until I waved the white flag and surrendered. Phone meetings are my life line and I love on line support its cool so many questions and answers right at your finger tips.

I am here to stay. I am a work in progress. I keep it simple and do it one day @ a time, united we stand...this is a we program! Keep coming back. When we stay around the rooms of Food Addicts Anonymous long enough, we become one of the miracles. Journey with us on the road to abstinent recovery. I love the quote do not quit no matter what and I'll say it again do not quit no matter what!!

[Darian]

A couple of acronyms that I find helpful are: "HALT" which stands for hungry, angry, lonely, tired. Also "BLT" stands for bite, lick, taste. You might find journaling helpful in looking at these words and thinking about when you are experiencing these feelings.

That's so true. I constantly remind myself the HALT but I don't know what BLT means, can you elaborate?
The clean two weeks that I had made me a believer of the food plan. I think at this point what I need is a sponsor. Do you know how I can get a sponsor which I can communicate online? I live in Europe.
Also I will definitely try the drinking water approach, that sounds like it could work. Thank you very much for your input, I really appreciate it.

[Darian]

Hey Alice,

I have learned to tell my self when tempted by foods not on the food plan to say this is not my food. I have had more than my share of those things.

I love this statement, it's so definite, final. Does it work for you every time? Saying a prayer also sounds like it would work, like when you say a prayer when you don't feel safe. I don' think I can do this alone, isolation is the trademark of this illness anyway. Thank you very much for your help, you are very kind.

[step3]

Darian,
I've sent you a Private Message. You can find your message by going to the upper right side of the Online Support page and looking under:

Notifications =>
Inbox

Thank you, and welcome to FAA!

step3

[here42da]

BLT isn't the bacon, lettuce, tomato sandwhich that we used to refer to before program, but is the Bite, Lick and Taste. What I am referring to is that all it takes is one little (bite) of a non-abstinent food to start me into eating the whole thing, or just a (lick) of a spoon, while preparing something for someone else. It is amazing how some of those habits came so natural in the past. And also how it is so much a part of the cooking and baking process from before program to (taste) to make sure it is spicy, or favored enough, or not too hot for my daughter to eat. These are behaviors that I have had to work on to eliminate in different ways because once ingested, the f/s/w my disease takes off with a vengence. I am chuckling a bit as I think of a cross stitch framed picture that I have hanging on my wall with a picture of a hippo eating an ice cream cone The caption is "once on the lips, forever on the hips" :chuncky: That for me is probably another good visualization. Thanks you FAA for being here for me today and for the support of all of the membership, and meetings and for this online support with all of the information we can access in these forums.

[step3]

Hi Darian,
What works for me when a food thought comes into my mind, is to firmly and immediately say to it, "NO, thank you!" I treat the thought (which is coming from my food addict mind) as if it were a pesky hostess at a party, who knows I don't eat sugar/flour/wheat anymore but insists I have some. The thought usually goes away when I am quick and firm with it. It's only when I let it stay and don't confront it, that it will start building on itself, and it doesn't take long, for me, for a food thought to become full-blown obsession. Once that happens, I'm in trouble, because the obsession is part of the 3-fold nature of addiction, and is VERY tough to overcome!

[kismet]

Hey Darian,

Wow, I so relate to this. I came into the program at age 22 and for much of my 20s I worked around food. It was even tempting because there was often abstinent food around, grilled vegetables and other "OK" foods prepared nicely, and I could often justify grazing on them as not that bad. But I am such a low bottom food addict that extra food between meals is really dangerous for me - it's not abstinent for me. I found that carrying my food with me and being totally committed to being abstinent worked well. I prepared food that was easy to eat on the fly--I even ate a number of meals in bathrooms. I have to laugh in retrospect, but it felt good to take care of myself in those situations. If your sponsor OKs it, another thing I did was switch my metabolic and my dinner if I was working a shift that would have me home by 8 or so.

Now I am in a work situation where I am often on the other side, where catered food is PROVIDED all day long. LOL. I just have to bring my own food. And know that I have a solution.

I also totally relate to the obsession step3 talks about. The sugar and flour and wheat foods are just so not worth it, but the addict voice always tells me otherwise.

I'm currently in Europe too (Netherlands) :)

Toby, food addict

[Darian]

Hey step3,
I just remembered that i read something similar in a self help book, when you say out loud 'I'm not eating cake now', supposedly your subconscious believes this and gets on board too. I'm at work right now thinking about cheese cake and telling my subconscious 'no I'm not in the mood for cheese cake right now'. It helps with cravings when I'm here reading everybody's comments, too. Thank you for suggesting that method, i'm doing it as i type.

[Darian]

Hey step3,
I just remembered that i read something similar in a self help book, when you say out loud 'I'm not eating cake now', supposedly your subconscious believes this and gets on board too. I'm at work right now thinking about cheese cake and telling my subconscious 'no I'm not in the mood for cheese cake right now'. It helps with cravings when I'm here reading everybody's comments, too. Thank you for suggesting that method, i'm doing it as i type.

[Darian]

Hey Toby,
I can only wish to be one day as committed as you are to being abstinent. You really are an inspiration. I was rambling on and on in this reply to you but then I decided to start a new thread out of how I feel like giving up already. Thank you for taking the time to share your story. It means a lot hearing from people who are out there fighting the good fight.

[Darian]

Hi here42da,
I agree with constant grazing being a problem, it's like pulling on a loose thread from a sweater. There's just no end to it, until you are completely unravelled.

[alicemdavid]

Darian,

Yes... it sure does work every time. I want you to know you are not alone. We are here for you this is a we program. I agree with you isolation is a trademark of this disease. Keep coming back...welcome to food addicts anonymous, we are glad you are here...do not quit no matter what!!

http://www.foodaddictsanonymous.org/phone-meetings

above is a link to the phone meetings they are my life line. I also love on line support so many questions & answers available 24/7 how cool is that!!

[nevertoolate]

HEY DARIAN, there are some situations that are almost impossible.......I know jobs are tough to find but if you feel you are a food addict, if sugar makes you miserable, if you are overweight,if you came to FAA for a reason....please do something really good for yourself and put all your energy into finding another job.....you are setting yourself up for certain failure as far as food addiction is concerned so ask your higher power for help, keep coming back here for support and a job will appear, and you will love that job too....have faith, miracles happen, I will pray for you and encourage other FAAers to pray for you to find another job soon...jobs are hard to find but good things happen when we believe....you can do this Darian.
marilyn, 72, in ohio
hugs to you and courage:chuncky:

[JustForToday]

The first bite is the one that I need to watch for - that extra bit of food outside my weighed and measured amount or that first bite of sugar/four/wheat. I look at the pastries now like they are poison and for me they will kill me as surely if I was to pick up a bottle of poison. So I ask my Higher Power to help me remember that - my "fast-forgetter" still wants to kick in at the oddest times and I think that it's the disease talking to me when it happens; so I really need my HP's help to stay on track. And it also helps to be in daily contact with my sponsor and other recovering food addicts. My disease loves it when I begin isolating and going to fewer phone meetings or just generally vegetating in front of the TV.

[Darian]

Marilyn,
Thank you very much for your refreshing view on this matter. I will seriously consider your suggestion if I haven't gotten it together by the end of december and that's a promise. I just want to give it a chance, seeing how the extremely social aspects of the job is helping me connect with people. I just haven't been that committed, making excuses. I know a day wil come when i will consider w/s/f as poison. Thank you for your prayers, i need that right now. You are so kind.